Thursday, March 22, 2007;
it was suppose to be a good day.. Dreamt of Dolly last nite, she asked abt my preparation for exam, Im so guilty. She is studyin in SMU n she said it was tough.. so happy tt she can continue her uni in heaven. Wonder how does SMU (heaven branch) looks like ? :)
I decided to opt for jc via uni route was actuali i wanted to fulfill her dream on behalf. The path was far too tough tt i tot it was. I sweat, teared, went thru despair n confidence regain stages over n over again till it seem so uncountable to me. But rite now, when i come to think abt it, im glad tt im where im todae. It started off by carrying hopes of hers, den became hopes n desire of my own. Not being able to get into local uni to stay in hostel n enjoy countless hall activities is indeed my regret. Bt i guess Jc pehaps isnt my route aftall. I shld be glad her hopes guided me up till uni, if not i may haf been struggling in the workin society wif a diploma. Although, i dunno how far or how beta wld tis SIM cert of mine bring for me( when i dun even a sec lower rite now) I choose to think tt it shld be better den diploma. Thus, I will strive to clear for a sec lower.
When i lose momentum i will take a look at her to energized myself. Shes an Ace scorer. As her cousin, i hope i will nt be too far fm her standard. If i dun study hope she haunts me at nite.. coz i miss her..
I dreamt of myself seeing the 4d draw results last nite. Since mama was gg down to Q, hee i decided to bet on my dreams. As the no. wasnt clear. I did a ibet. N result is i striked!! winnings: $6 bucks enough to cover cost n maybe can donate away the few bucks.
Its not abt the money bt its e joy n luck when u strike. I hope tis will be the turning point of my luck.
went qing ming todae, grandma haf shifted into a renovated plc in kwang ming shan. Every yr without fail we can nv find her urns.. Its so weird! Few yrs ago it shifted due to renovation we cant find until aft some search n enquiry. Last yr, my aunt kept the blk n # of e urns to herself when she received the letter of notification. Although her r/s wif my dad isnt good, i dun see e nid to hide. Afterall, is jus praying our ancestors isnt it.. *sighs*got a few Dharma Books jus realised there are equalli good compared to the BIbles. I love reading them.
I tot i haf put it down till i see my agitated & nervous reaction when i failed to get my query answered..
exams are drawing nearer when i haf wasted a week. Im oso pretty worried for unexpected things tt may arise within tis crucial period. life is full of endless uncertainty. Thats something even insurance cant insure u of..
Here a part on "dont worry" picked up fm the Dharma bk that i have read :
The secret of happy, successful living is what needs to be done now, and not worry about the past or the future. We cannot reshape the past, nor can we anticipate everything in future. There is but one moment of time over which we have some conscious control and that is the present.
Many people jus worry about the future. They haf to learn to adjust themselves to the circumstances. Whatever castles they may build in the air, whatever dreams they may have they must always remember that they are living in this world of constant friction and change.
"There are no stars which we could trust,
there is no guiding light,
And we know that we must
BE GOOD , BE JUST,BE RIGHT."
Gosh! its a super long post.. Im ending it with somethin interesting..

do i reli look like them ? hmm.. i shall try wif other photos nxt time. Tis foto was like 2 yrs ago :)
ps: pardon me, i dun like to do spell check or check dictionary for words i dunno how to spell coz it breaks my chain of thoughts. So make a guess,if theres a nid for one .. :)
I cry and I weep... Because of you...
2:45 AM
The QUEEN of DRAMA
iTs all abouT mE, WO & mE!! :)
Moi likes and dislikes.
[[`*My Adores]]
Food:Prawn Mee soup,salted veg duck soup,seafood tomyam,sting ray, kangkung, chilli sotong & balck pepper crab!!
Drinks: Heaven&Earth orange&green tea
Pastimes: sleep,shop, slack,dream,music
People:GrANdma & Dolly
[[`*My Detests]]
People: hypocrites, backstabbers,hao lian-ers
Things: insects!
Food: bitterguard,carrot
Moi current obssessions hmmm... tinking in progree..
[[`*Music'sPlaying]]
Artist:sammi cheng
Song:song of love